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Friday, October 17, 2008

tonight I punched a monster in the face

     I didn't mean to.  Honest.


     A group of us went to a haunted house tonight--actually, more like a haunted structure.  Or rather, structures. It was called The 7 levels of Hell, though I do believe that hell would be tons worse than what I saw tonight.  

     I mean, really, if you can buy a corn dog in hell than well, it's definitely not hell.  

     Oh, and tonight I had my first corn dog ever!  It was absolutely delicious.  So delicious, in fact, that I got another one before the end of the night. Don't judge...

      Anyway, we were going through one of the structures--this one was a corn maze, I believe--and I was clutching on to Ian's arm with all the strength and determination of a woman anticipating a monster to jump out at her at any moment (though, I did notice that Ian was just as happy to clutch my arm right back), when I saw this fake face peeking out at me through the fence.  

    Well, I am not sure what, exactly, came over me because it is generally not my style to just punch inanimate objects in their inanimate faces, but maybe I will toss it up to the corn dog, or rather, corn dogs because when  I saw it's ugly little weedy face, I just punched it.  

    And then, horror of all horrors, it came to life!

     IT. CAME. TO. LIFE.

     And started growling and moving and being altogether NOT inanimate at all.  I screamed and jumped back (making sure to not let go of Ian's arm, mind you).  As soon as I was at a safe distance away from the monster I apologized to it profusely because I really do not want to promote violence--even if it is towards a monster that you think is inanimate.  

    People in my group started informing me that I would have to go to jail because there was a sign at the ticket booth that stated: Punch a monster, go to jail.  

   Oh crap, I thought, I hope they serve corn dogs in jail, I hoped.  

    Turns out that was an empty threat, though, because well, I am blogging now and obviously not in jail. But yeah, I punched a monster in the face.  How many people can say that, I wonder?

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jess, you are so funny and sweet! I can just picture you punching the "monster", running away, then apologizing...hilarious!!

Jessica said...

thanks! However, I don't think the monster would agree that I am "so funny and sweet!"

Mama Bear said...

I recently took Jackson on a Haunted Hay Ride, although I honestly hadn't noticed the haunted part until an alien jumped out and tried to get on our wagon. Jackson's friend Rex, jumped up and yelled "someone hit him, someone get him, he is trying to get Jackson!" So although he wasn't able to hit the monster himself, he was trying to enlist some help....to bad you weren't there you could have been his hero!

christine said...

Jess...what's up with you and going to 'haunted' places lately? You have such a funny love/hate relationship with being scared. I hate being scared but you, you kind of like it. You like the occasional scary movie, or scary book. It's partly why you are so fascinated with sharks I would say...the thrill that they are so dangerous!
I'm glad to hear though that you can hold your own even when confronted with a monster : )

Michele said...

First, who is Ian, and why are you holding on to his arm and second, did Kathie K really comment you at 5:42am????

Jessica said...

Jamie--I would have loved to have been Jackson's hero--but it sounds like he already had one in his friend, Rex!

Christine--I know, I admit I do like the thrill of being scared--fake scared, though, not REALLY scared:-)

and Michele, Ian is one of my dear friends in the show (he plays Bobby and does a fab job doing it, I must say). And don't you worry bout a thing--our friendship is purely platonic;-)

Anonymous said...

Michele, Jess does not have her blog on our time, or else you would have been posting while you were at the retreat tonight! Jess, are you in Toronto? What is the time difference? I did stay up until approximately 4:20ish (a.m.) Saturday, because I was baking bread, so I still probably posted at a ridiculous hour, I just can't remember what it was!

Jessica said...

My computer's date and time is all wonky right now...So yeah, you can't look at the times as concrete or anything because most of the time my computer says it's 1969--and I wasn't even around then!

And I am still in Cleveland right now--not in Toronto yet, though I am pretty sure that Toronto will be the same time zone as the east coast...

Anonymous said...

Yes, I think that is right, Toronto should be the same time. I can't remember if Cleveland is different or not; we did drive through Ohio on the way to Missouri for Nathan's graduation, but I don't remember about the time. If there is a difference, it is only an hour. In any case, it was a ridiculous time for me to be posting a comment on your blog! Just like right now!

By the way, Jess, you are right about the monster, he wouldn't think you were funny and sweet, but I was just taken by the mental image you conjured up!

Jessica said...

Lol, Kathie!

And cleveland, at least, IS the same time zone as home;-)

Anonymous said...

I think only you and one of the Coreys from Lost Boys can claim such a feat. Well done Jessica!

Jessica said...

thanks, Archie!

but I gotta say...who are the Coreys from the Lost Boys?

Anonymous said...

Corey Haim and Corey Feldman played teen vampire hunters in the Lost Boys, a vampire flick with Jason Patric, Kiefer Sutherland, Dianne Wiest, Edward Herrmann, Jami Gertz, Barnard Hughes, and Alex Winter.

Anonymous said...

It's worth the watch, as classic as The Goonies, watch it just in time for Halloween... but be warned, it's classic 80's