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Saturday, July 5, 2008

happy 4th of July, though this is not about the 4th of July at all

             Here's some irony for you: I just finished writing an email to the Toonz Piano Bar.  On their website they are actively looking for musicians to contact them.  So, in an effort to be proactive and professional and a go-getter, I email them with all of the necessary information about me--I even include a link to my new music myspace site, so that they can listen to my stuff.  Oh, and I found this place after doing a google search for live music venues in San Francisco (which is where I will be for the next three weeks, starting this Monday).  Anyway, I include all my contact info, and then press send and return to their home page.  And this is when I notice that they are located in San Jose, not San Francisco.  I am no expert in geography, but I am pretty sure they are two entirely different cities.  Thanks, google. Thanks, a lot.  


            I was just listening to U2's song, Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own, and was suddenly comforted by it.  I think I can be introverted.  At least, I can certainly spend a lot of time by myself and not feel a bit saddened by it.  A lot of things I love to do, I do best alone--like write music, read books, listen to music, write, shop, walk or run, and choreograph. Because of this, I think I can go for a while without realizing that I really do need other people.  This may sound weird, but sometimes I can be lonelier in a crowd than by myself.  Alone, I am content with my thoughts; I am comfortable.  But sometimes I don't know what to say to people, sometimes I can feel like I don't quite fit in.  The piano, for instance, has always been an escape for me.  I can remember being at my parents' house and just playing and playing--until Jonathan finally came over and was like, Hey Jess, why don't you be a little social?  Why don't you say hello...

        A few weeks ago, some people from the cast was hosting a Tony's Party and there was a piano sitting right there, in plain sight.  I was not having a good time at the party--had to do a lot of fake laughing and pretending of ease--and I wanted to play that piano so badly, but I knew I had to be social...Still, the piano stood there like a mirage before me...

  So anyway, I was listening to this song and struck by the fact that there are people in my life who are invaluable.  I need these people, not because I don't know who I am without them, per se, but because their influence has helped make me who I am.   None of us are exempt from this basic need of relationships, even the introverts, I guess.  And it's good to be reminded of this from time to time.   

9 comments:

Susan Marie said...

Jess, have a really fun time in San Francisco- I am a little jealous- but I take comfort in the thought that Jason and I will probably be visiting out there within the year. Too bad we can't make our visit coincide with your performance!

Anonymous said...

"People, people who need people...are the luckiest people, in the world..." Actually, I don't believe in luck, but I would say that people who realize they need others are very blessed. As much as I enjoy being with people (those of you who know me would agree that I am an extrovert), I really need my alone time, too. I think it recharges me to be at home. It is a place of sanctuary, peace, and rest. There are times, however, when I have a hard time leaving my home (I wasn't always like that). I am comfortable there, sitting in my comfy chair. Being comfortable is not bad, I just can't camp out there, sometimes I have to get out and challenge, or stretch, myself. It's a balancing act.

Peaj said...

Gosh, what did you want Google to do - reach out through the monitor and slap you about head and shoulders and yell: "Yo! Girl! Wake up - wrong city!" Not sure, but I think that the terms of use indicate that you need to actually read your search results. ;-)

By the way, this post is now the number one search result for "Toonz Piano Bar" on Google. Looks like Google is playing some jokes on you.

Introverts can be such fun, because most know how to play the role of an extrovert. Most actors tend to be introverts.

I am a definite introvert. At times (more frequently a few years ago) I would get something like vertigo that would devolve into a panic attack in a crowd. Meetings in the Old Barn were really bad. But I can't play the piano, so to comfort myself I would start to sing. In tongues.

I don't get invited to many parties.

Jessica said...

haha, PJ!

Actually, I wanted to google to do a search for venues in SAN FRANCISCO, like I specified...that's all...

Anonymous said...

maybe you should have searched for piano bars in san franfrisky.

Anonymous said...

My goodness, if Jess had done that, Jason, who knows what responses she would get (haha)!

Peaj said...

I'll tell Larry you're peeved at Google. Next time I talk to him. ;-)

Piano bars in San Fran

Looks like Google was looking out for you - the Toons Piano bar doesn't sound very nice. Though some of the comments are hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Jess, just wanted to let you know i stopped by!

Jessica said...

thanks for the help, Peaj!!!