I think the older I get, the more, ahem, bold I get.
Like, I don't just sit back and let people be rude. Or at least, I try not to. And when I am appalled at how another behaves, and if it is in any way directed towards me, then I will say something. Hopefully, with kindness as the intent...
For instance, I was at the gym yesterday, you know, minding my own business at the free weights, just standing in front of the mirror doing curls. This lady walks up, positions herself directly behind me and is about to start doing her own curls. She hesitates and pointedly looks at me. I continue to work out. She continues to stare. Then, her staring progresses into something else as she takes her hand, and with an annoyed look fixed on her features, proceeds to start shooing me away.
Really.
She is now definitively gesturing that I should move, because she can't see herself, because she parked herself behind me in the first place. I wish, though, that you could see the look that was on her face, because it really did speak volumes; it was somewhere between smug and condescending, but smack in the middle of rude.
So I turn around and gaze at her with a huge question mark on my face. Truly, you couldn't mistake my look. At her continued gesturing, I finally say, Excuse me?
Well, I didn't know if you wanted to move so that I wouldn't hit you, she states.
Well, I didn't know if you wanted to use words and actually ask me to move and say please, as well, I answer.
At this, she simply says, I didn't know if you could hear me because of your headphones...
I can hear just fine, I say, very deliberately.
And with that, I move over for her to have the space that she so obviously wants.
But honestly, some people are just so rude. Now, had that lady come up and maybe tapped me on the shoulder to get my attention (since she was so positive that I couldn't hear), and when she had it, simply said, Would you mind moving over, please? I would have moved in a heartbeat. But her rude gestures, as if I were a dog, simply put, burned me up.
And yes, I said something. Apparently it is not just 3 year olds who need to be reminded to use their words and say please. Hopefully the next time she wants someone to move, she will get her way in a less obnoxious manner. I mean, whatever happened to good manners? Being polite? Using words, for goodness' sake?!
Okay, just had to share. As my nephew Ollie would say, that's it.
13 comments:
Dag. So that's why I can't get people to move. Huh.
I just read that people are not being taught manners any longer. It's a lost art. Simple things like saying "please" and "thank you" are not within people's training any longer.
I hate to say it but.. I really think it has to do with the internet. I realize how hypocritical that sounds with us being on this blog but I think that people's communication has been slightly stunted.
Or then again, she could just be a manner-less jerk. :)
Way to stand up for yourself. Believe it or not I have no trouble standing up for others but for some reason I can't really do it for myself very well.I either completely wimp out or get really angry and start to cry. It is annoying.
Mom-the sad thing is that this woman was middle-aged; so it's not like she is a really young person--I guess I would have just thought that she would know better.
beingawesome--that may very well be; people just don't have as much accountability (esp. on the internet), so maybe that bleeds into real life, too.
Merry-I suppose if I had to choose, it is the better, less selfish, thing to do to stand up for others rather than just yourself. You have a very big heart.
And Peaj--yes, perhaps you should try to use your words!;-)
I think sometimes people are so upset that they go looking for trouble so they can direct their angst at someone. Glad you stood up for yourself.
I think you take your boldness from Mom :)
I definitely teach good manners to my students, but sometimes I feel like I am in an uphill battle. I do agree with "mom" that people are not being taught manners any more...at least that is how it seems. Of course, in all fairness, my students are quite young, so it could be that some of it just hasn't sunk in yet, but I do see more and more that people show less respect, through common courtesy (which is now more UNCOMMON than it used to be) toward others.
that is rude!!!
Well Jess, I give you credit for trying, but what you should have said was, "If you don't want to hit me, quit standing behind me!" Truth be told, I probably wouldn't have said that either, but I definitely would have thought it!!
I know, Michele!!! I don't understand why she planted herself directly behind me and then expected me to move...Very strange, indeed.
That IS rude!
I recently had an encounter at a gas station in which I had to ask a woman who had parked her car directly between the two pumps to move. There was no way for me to get my car close enough to the pump for the hose to reach my gas tank. I asked her to move and she gave me a dirty look and backed up -- one inch!
wow. that's SO RUDE! what did you do after she moved one inch?!?!
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