Friday, June 27, 2008

costumes are not designed for comfort, I am pretty sure

        It is really unfortunate how much time I spend being just plain uncomfortable in my profession.  Because, I hate to be uncomfortable.  I mean, I realize I am not alone in this feeling, but still, I try to live in comfort--as much as my sense of fashion and my job allow me.  In my current show, I have to wear fishnet tights.  You think, not so bad--all those little holes must be a nice natural cooling system, not unlike what Jess gets to enjoy on a daily basis in her house.  Well, sure.  Maybe.  But, actually, the material is a little itchy, and very tight (thus, the word, tights, I suppose).  I also have to dance--really dance--we're not talking about step-touching or a shimmy every once in a while; no, turns leaps, kicks, lunges, the whole shabang--in 3 inch heels.  I know most of you have never done ballet, but ballet was not designed for 3 inch heels.  Maybe if you have played basketball, you can imagine playing the game just as competitively as always, but with little poles stuck under your sneakers; maybe then you can understand how not natural it is to do a split in the air and land in heels.  Maybe.  

      Then, I get to wear a leotard just about every day of my life.  Ok, most leotards are not that bad, providing that they do not have sleeves (I hate to dance in sleeves--so much so that I have actually slipped out of a modern class midway through and cut the sleeves off of my leotard.  I swear I danced better when I got back into that studio. Really), and are not too tight around the neck.  Well, my leotard has no sleeves, thankfully, but it has a halter neck (which means that it has a strap that comes around the back of my neck, very tightly).  As if that tight strap were not enough, I have to wear a bra that of course has to be a halter, too--meaning that I have not one, but two tight straps suffocating the back of my neck.  And there is a great mystery in our show, one which many audience members have inquired after--that is, wherever do we hide  our microphone transmitters? Well, I am gonna let you in on a little secret that, if asked, you didn't hear from me: the ladies put it in their bra, the men put it in the crotch of their dance belts.  Well sure, the men have it pretty bad--but so do I! It is so very uncomfortable and heavy--that mic in my bra--making that horrible strap around the back of my neck even tighter, making a headache even more inevitable, making me adjust my costume on stage even when I've been told not to because goodness, it hurts! So yeah, note me.  But, I am going to move those straps on stage every once in a while.  Sorry.  

   The one saving grace that I have is my hair.  It is very short--too short to put in any painful configuration that pulls on my scalp.  Too short to curl.  Too short to straighten with a flat-iron.  It is absolutely comfortable.  

   Oh, and now I realize that I could walk around in mu-mu's and crocks, but I do need to present myself stylishly.  You never know who you are going to meet in this business, and I enjoy fashion for fashion's sake.  I know what a pair of heels can do for a pair of legs.  I like a good pair of skinny jeans.  So, after the show, sometimes I am still wearing heels--yes, this time of my own choosing, but still, it's tough.  It's fun to be a girl, but not always comfy.  Which is why when I get home, I go straight to my room, kick off my shoes and put on something very soft, very loose, with some kind of elastic waist.  Oh, and knee socks, to top if off.  

   And sometimes I dream about doing A Chorus Line wearing something very soft, very loose, elastic-waisted, coupled with knee socks, and maybe a pair of sneakers.  Wow, that would be amazing.  Not a tight strap in sight.  Maybe someday.   

Oh, and for any of you who are interested, I finally set up a myspace music page.  I have four songs uploaded on it, and will be adding more when I can.  You can find me at



Mom said...

Not ever having been able to walk in heels with any stability and not being able to wear lipstick without talking strangely, I certainly was not the daughter my mom wished she had given birth to. Mom was someone that believed in being fashionable and fully make-upped wearing the highest of heels on her tiny, child-like feet at all times. I wondered at times if she wore those heels to bed! However, even though I'm not fashionable, I do appreciate it when I see it. It's too bad that Mom wasn't able to see you grown up. She would have been so proud of your grace and sense of fashion!

Jessica Latshaw said...

I know, mom! One of my favorite memories of Mimi is getting to go to this fancy dress shop with her with the intention of picking out a dress for me!

We rode in the gold corvette on the way there (though, I do remember sensing some apprehension on your and pop's part having to do with Mimi's driving skills).

And then, I got to pick out any dress in the store--it was a little girl's dream!

Jenna said...

there's nothing better then comf pants!

Jessica Latshaw said...

Yep, Jen! You and I aren't the only ones who say, "Let's get comf" anymore--I got Drew to say it too!